The lives we live are not ours.
The life you live, the life you see reflecting at you every day, the life you think you solely own, is not solely yours. Your joys you let infect you, your sorrows you let corrode you, your fears you never confront are not yours. The desires you let choke you, the lust you never quench enough, are not yours too.
You own nothing. You are nothing.
Your life is his’. Hers’ too. Your desires, fears and your morbidity; it’s the same, you are sharing it with them. In the same breath. In the same sticky sweat. In the very same blink of the eye. You don’t know it yet. You may not know it ever. You are a fucking fool all your life. That is the game.
You wait all your life for the Godot. You wait till the moment arrives when your life is capsized. And then you are up! Like a kitten from a nap that smelled fish. You sit upright, you look around, awake from the drunken torpor, and sit by the window with the dappled sun on your messed up life and decide to give life a serious thought. You pick up the pieces of the jigsaw and try to act smart. But try as you might, the pieces defy to fall into place.
You sit there, like a retard, wondering what to do with the pieces and how to get your acts together. May be all you have to do is just shift a little in your seat to accommodate one simple truth, and still have that sun shine on you. That, the puzzle you are fiddling with, the pieces you hold staring at, are not just. That, its not just about you. That, you need more than you. That, you are only one of the gazillion pieces of the very puzzle that you try to solve.
Yes, you woke up only to realize you travelled just half the way. To realize your life is inextricably knotted with everyone else’s out there. To simply perceive, might or might not you want it, you are an inexplicable scrap of a convoluted plot that some extremely witty playwright is penning and somehow has an ensemble cast.
Oh honey, the lives we live are not ours alone.
PS. Inspired by the film 21 Grams. After been blown away into smithereens and floating around for sometime weightless, i picked myself up and sat down and wrote this.
9 wave(s):
Somebody attempting to write my biography? Well, it is the biography of most of us. But one has to get to middle age to understand the heaviness of the truth in your words...
At last good sense prevailed and persuaded you to change the ‘don’t talk to me, if you haven’t seen 21 grams…’ good! Otherwise I would’ve said ‘alas! What an elitist attitude’ :) for I haven’t even heard of the film, let alone watching it. :)
How marvelously, how adorably you write! Look at this; “You wait till the moment arrives when your life is capsized. And then you are up! Like a kitten from a nap that smelled fish. You sit upright, you look around, awake from the drunken torpor, and sit by the window with the dappled sun on your messed up life and decide to give life a serious thought.”
What an imagery that is, I’m just speechless.
I just read the synopsis of the movie.
Wonder what prompted you to pen the blog.
The question is what is the 21 grams. If it is weightless then how we discern it is the question. But in the end does it really matter?
In any case what came about after all this, and what would not be if it were not?
The questions only give one answer as you mentioned, there is nothing that is ours.
Sumi - a good post and another film on to the must watch list..your post inspired me to read more about the concept, which played a big role in naming the movie.. the weight of the human soul being 21 grams as experimented by the physician Duncan MacDougall..quite a provoking concept and my recent ventures trying to make sense of the human mind / soul (as one would like to call it) makes it more appealing..more than the post, its timing and name struck a huge chord with me personally..thanks :)
B - do watch 21 grams if you havent :)
Arun - hahahha. i felt too that was little bit cocky. and thanks :)
Anil - The synopsis wont do justice to the impact that awaits u wen u watch the film. your queries shall be answered then, i suppose :)
Ousu - i agree. its a mind boggling yet interestingly provocative subject - soul weighs 21 grams. very interesting. do watch the film if u havent.
Sumi - i watched the movie last night after your blog..i loved the make of it and also the way the story gets told..the difference in the time perspective..that was a good suggestion mate :)
Hello, I saw the film yesterday. wonder how In missed hearing of it.
The concept of 21 gms though is still to be noted empirically, the concept is fascinating. To weigh as mush as a Humming bird , is it gaseous or other form?
The film was indeed good.It besides the points that you mentioned of the intertwining of life,also provokes the ones who talk about order and design from somewhere above.
Ousu - anytime mate.being a filmmaking student u can trust my tastes :)
Anil - im sooo glad that u watched it. its a beautiful film isnt it? something that totally disarms you off all your defense and pretense and hypocrisy? :)
good one
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